I Wish 2Pac Was Still Here

I Wish 2Pac Was Still Here

I wish Tupac was still alive. From the complexities of a thug poet, budding actor, and truly tortured soul, I wonder what direction Tupac would be heading now. Would he be a transcendent actor, known for playing a multitude of roles, similar to Will Smith. Smith's career started with a successful rap career which he parlayed into a mega-star, featuring in summer blockbuster after the other. Or, would he stick to his musical roots? Many of Hip-Hop's founding fathers are still toiling with life after fame, suffering from meager record sales, lack of label security, and younger artists constantly attacking their elder statesmen. LL Cool J, once popular foundation of Def Jam, now deals with a lack of purchasing fanbases and even less prominent movie roles, currently plying his trade in prime time cop dramas. Or, would he have become the revolutionary figure that he strives to become? Commanding a nation of millions of young Black, and white 18-40's, 2Pac of the mid-90's preached of a distrust of government and societal norms. The radical rapper believed in many conspiracy theories that he claims was all enacted by the will of the controlling powers, a secret society called the Illuminati. Many ultimately believe that Tupac's murder was a response to his constant opposition of the Illuminati, along with his ties to the Black Panther Party.

Personally, I think the latter would be more likely. Tupac, at the height of his fame and success, began speaking out his beliefs, with a following of millions to listen to his messages, Tupac felt he had a path to enlighten his people through his influence and music. I just don't believe that a Tupac who would have been allowed to continue to live and grow would ever reduce himself to not only a heavy consumer influenced, false reality system that now rules Hip-Hop, nor would he allow himself to be silenced in society. I am somewhat comforted believing that the game would be so much different if we didn't lose Pac or B.I.G. They say that if you killed a butterfly in the past, it could completely change the future. Well, if Hip-Hop's greatest were allowed to fully flourish, we could be in a whole different place, and here's to hoping it is a better one.

Rest In Peace, Tupac Amaru Shakur.

PS. "They'll never take me alive, I'm gettin' high with my four-five,
Cocked on these suckas, time to die
Even as a youngster causin' ruckus on the back of the bus
i was a fool all through high school kickin' up dust
But now I'm labelled as a trouble maker who can you blame?
Smokin' weed helped me take away the pain
So I'm hopeless rollin' down the freeway swervin, don't worry
I'm about to crash up on the curb cause my visions blurry
Maybe if they tried to understand me, what should I do?
I had to feed my f--kin' family, what else could I do
but be a thug
out slangin' with the homies
f--k hangin' with them phonies in the club
got my mind on danger
never been a stranger to homicide
my cities full of gang bangers and drive bys
why do we die at an early age
he was so young
but still a victim of the 12 gauge
my memories of a corpse
mind full of sick thoughts
and I ain't goin back to court
so f--k what you thought I'm drinkin' hennessey
runnin from my enemies will I live to be 23
there's so much pain..." - Pain, from the Above The Rim soundtrack

-J.O.-

I said I write in this...5 months ago.

-Redirection/dedication-

The grind continues. I thought I'd be doing a lot of things right now, but it seems that my square peg plans still don't fit into the round hole. That's life, right?

I would love to say all of it is that I have tried and failed, that I balanced my time properly and in everything I tried, that I went all out, giving my best effort. Sadly, I can not say that. I've committed a common mistake. I've tried to multi-task, while not having all my best priorities highlighted. My failure to plan and follow through has doomed two projects, while my increasing schedule of trying to make ends meet has caused an idea to die. Wordtoem.com, my project and hopefully, my meal ticket, has not been focused and has stopped growing, due to the grind of making money.

So how to re-correct my heading and start over is my new project. Finishing school is now the sole priority, with Wordtoem taking a backseat for the time being. I've been in school for 2 Olympics now. I missed a chance to go to the World Cup because my funds weren't right. It would have been my second World Cup trip since I graduated high school.

Basically, it's time to grow the hell up. For the times I have failed, for everytime I've said A and did B, for everytime I've met deadline and missed deadline, for every cruel word when all that was needed was a kind one, I must turn my direction around, I must lead myself into a better future.

And I must keep writing, because in writing, my focus is maintained.

Till we meet again,
-James O.

So back to this blog...

So I'm going to start posting to this as a way to help me remember that I have a website that needs maintaining. Sorta like supplementary reading. And my boy V got his going, and he can't have a blog better than mine....so competition breeds quality, I guess! Cheers!

Life's A Bitch...Then You Die

Just so everyone knows, I REALLY don't feel like writing this. I was supposed to be writing about something happy. I was SUPPOSED to be writing about my trip to Nebraska. I should be posting pictures about a victory over hated rival Oklahoma. I should have a story on how I went to Howie's and got tanked with some old friends at Woody's in Lincoln. I should be nostalgic about how I never should have left the best football school, the best university on the planet, the place of my birth. But I had to sell my plane ticket, my game tickets. I had business to attend to.

I never really understood that phrase. Life's a bitch, then you die. It's almost been two years since I lost two of my best friends, Nate Butler and Jason Dimmick. This past week, I lost my cousin James Williams, and Rachel Newell, someone I've known since she was a baby. Our parents worked together, and I was childhood friends with her older brother, Ralph.

My cousin James, or "Little J" as we liked to call him, was the son of James "Big Jamie" Williams. Forever, I've been called Jamie, and most people from Midland, West Virginia, Georgia and Nebraska, know me as Jamie. Even though I thought it was a girl's name, he used it. Granted, he was 6'5, 255 pounds. I loved him because when my brothers picked on me, when my cousins picked on me, he always had my back. We were both reserved, quiet kids.

He died on my birthday. I cry every birthday when I think about him. He was older than my oldest brother, but close enough to Midland that I could see him a lot. He frequently had me in Detroit with him, when he could get time off practice. He was a Detroit Lion, and he's the reason I cheered for them, even to this day. The only club who'd give him a chance became a lifelong love of mine. I was his shadow. Everyone in my family called us "the Jamies." He was "Big Jamie" and I was "Little Jamie." When he had his son, I told him to name him Jamie. I'd like to think when he named him James, it was because of me. He became "Little Jamie." I was just Jamie after that. I told my cousin when he died that I would take care of "Little Jamie." When "Little Jamie" grew to be "Lil J" as we called him, I promised again, every time I went to my big cousin's grave, that I would help train his son. With Lil J's death, I feel an overwhelming sadness that I never thought possible. More than just losing a cousin, I feel like I failed my cousin Big Jamie. I couldn't protect him.

I've been getting the typical messages, all messages I've given others along the way. Put your trust in the Lord; we're praying for you, so on and so forth. It's surprising how little comfort those words can give after weeks like this one.

I guess I understand that phrase a lot better now.

The Great Debate - Hip Hop Version

It’s been a minute since we dropped something thought provoking for you, so we think it’s about time to drop something for you to think about. This weekend, your boy J.O. [that's myself for those who don't know] and Stig [our other E.I.C.] were just chillin with the crew, and that topic jumps up again. I think by now, we all know what the “Great Debate” is. Jay-Z versus Nas.

“I from where n****s pull your car, and argue all day about/Who’s the best MC’s, Biggie, Jay-Z, and Nas?” – Jay-Z “Where I’m From”

Maybe the God-emcee knew where his career was headed. It’s near the end of 2009 and still, the “Great Debate” continues. We are all sitting around watching football, and when the debate starts, the calm, mild mannered brothers around the table get hype, quickly. We post up, listening to all the banter back and forth; “Jay-Z got all these great albums,” “Nas got mad quotables,” “Jigga’s got papers,” “Nas holds the struggle down.”

A variety of all the same. Except for the first time, I get a new perspective. There is really starting to be a backlash from this long debate. One of the newer perspectives that arise comes in the form of an anti-Jay-Z backlash. A new common perspective is that Jay-Z fans elevate him so much that it caused people to hate him. I dig Jay, and Reasonable Doubt is one of my favorite albums ever. I just picked up Blueprint 3, and I think it’s pretty hot. I also dig on Nas, and Illmatic is a classic. I’m anticipating that Distant Cousins LP with Damien Marley. I am a big fan of both.

I haven’t seen this big a division between Jay and Nas since “Ether” and “Takeover.” The ironic part of it all, is that they are currently cool, no beef, Jay has (or had) Nas on the label. Just picked up some audio with Nas and Jay touring Europe, though most of the audio has been deleted, we got a little gift for you. Listen and/or download….but listen nonetheless.

Worst enemies wanna be my best friends. Best friends wanna be enemies like that's what's in.

Jay-Z and Nas Live in London

Another notion I heard was that Jay-Z is better on the basis that his rhymes are easy to recite. Cats were yelling across the room, spit a Jay-Z verse, which is pretty easy or hard, depending on the song, its’ popularity, so on and so forth. Then our Jay stan yells to spit a Nas verse. I’m not going to lie, while I can spit more Jay verses, Nas a few real memorable ones. But you can’t determine who is better based on if you can spit the lines. I can probably recite, no, DEFINITELY recite more Kris Kross lines than Nasty Nas, but that in no way means that Kris Kross is superior. It miffed me a bit to hear that. Nas has been known for having dynamic, and often advanced concept raps. Jay-Z uses more common words, but his usage of words is unrivaled.

I like to refer to sports, my default settings, when comparing Nas vs. Jay-Z. I call it Michael and Shaq. There is no doubt that Shaq is the most dominant big man ever. All the past greats had the height advantages, but Shaq would have abused those other great centers because of sheer power. I give Nas the Shaq designator. Nas is a beast on the mic, and his word play and story telling is his dominant trait. Both Nas and Shaq have this primary trait in common; they never get the respect they truly deserve because their games aren’t flashy. But they get the job done, and are not going to be dominant by one person, ever.

Jay-Z gets the Jordan comparison, and he get this because of his overall appeal. His staying power, his length at the top, and his ability to dwarf his peers because of his sheer skill at winning. Plus the retire/ un-retire drama doesn’t hurt Hov get this title. Album after album, Jay delivered winning product. In the streets and the suburbs, Jay-Z and Jordan enjoyed success, fame, and their size fits their accomplishments.

The problem arises when people try to compare Jordan versus Shaq. Jordan has more titles than Shaq, sure, but Shaq can’t shut Jordan down in his comfort zone, the wings. In the post, however, Shaq would murder MJ.

Just like the Shaq/Jordan example, Nas and Jay dominant their respective fields. Street stories and block tails are Nas’ post. No one does that better than Nasty. The “Ether” was Nas grabbing the rock at the post, pivot, turn and slam. The “Takeover” was a good effort, I mean, all those Jumpman poses were dunks, gotta go to the post to make those moves, but in Jay’s case, the post is Nas’ territory, and when he decided to go into Nas’ area, Nas had to punish him, swatting that weak junk out there. I liked “Takeover,” but we still call getting killed in a battle the “Ether,” so what does that tell you? In the wings, or the public view, Jay wins all day. But to those of us who know Hip Hop was born off the block, that was a rather emphatic victory for Nasty.

Either way you stand, be open to both artists, they are a perfect example for Hip Hop’s yin and yang. Neither is the all-encompassing standard, so we NEED both, and its important that people know that. That’s my word…

College Football World Tour - ND v USC

Sorry, I've been missing in action. It is for a good reason, I assure you. Lately, I've been busy with work, Word To Em.com, and of course, my College Football World Tour 2009. So far, I've been to the Michigan vs. Western Michigan and Michigan vs. Notre Dame games, both at Michigan Stadium, one of the largest in the country. However, this past week, I got to go see Notre Dame against the USC Trojans. My first time down to Indiana to see any kind of college football game. I am not really a fan of either team, but my girl Katie got the tickets, and I'm ALWAYS down for whatever, especially since I am addicted to college football. Unfortunately, my other photos didn't come out well, so Photoshop and I are going on a two-week date. I had to post this photo, though. My savior and Lord, Jesus and me, tailgating the game. Or should I say...TOUCHDOWN JESUS! That's how I know God is a football fan. Instead of the freezing rain and all clouds we were supposed to get, nothing but sunshine and lollipops for this lovely Saturday.

My boy J.P. hosted me as we traveled across ND's pristine campus. It was amazing to go into the Basilica. We even went past Corby's, the bar where they filmed "Rudy" in. College football royalty indeed. So thank you, Jesus! Thank you for creating football! TOUCHDOWN JESUS!!

That dying for our sins thing is kinda cool, too.

I love saying Touchdown Jesus. But now it makes me feel kind of bad. I've whipped MANY an ass for talking trash about my beloved Cornhuskers. He did not create football for me to cause as much havoc. I've hospitalized TWO people for saying my Huskers sucked. I'm working on that one, Lord. Maybe you could help us SCORE SOME TOUCHDOWNS so I don't have to hurt people when my Huskers lose.

Speaking of my Huskers, THAT'S THE NEXT STOP!! Nebraska vs Oklahoma!! Screw the Sooners!! I'm SOOOOOO excited!!!

I Have GOT to stop drinking so much...

Luckily, this doesn't really concern me. The title, I mean. I don't have a drinking problem. Not at all.

This past weekend, I had a blast. I'm talking football up to the ceiling, booze filled tailgates, and birthday parties. Drove to Michigan State for the football game. It was an absolute blast, except for the fact I was late for the GOOD part of tailgate. I didn't mind that so much, because after the game, I drove to Detroit to see my baby and celebrate her birthday. That proved to be less of a problem than I thought. See, I am a VERY paranoid driver. Ever since I flipped my car this past winter, I have been the worst driver on the road. Overly careful, driving slow in the pass lane, driving 5 miles below the speed limit, regardless of the weather. I have basically become everything I hate about drivers, all because of that tramatic experience.

What do I do to offset those bad feelings? Well, THIS time, I knocked down a pint of Jack Daniels! And it was good, too. So an hour passes, MSU pulls out a huge victory over Michigan, and I head to Detroit. I feel so much better driving now, that little bit helped take the edge off. I get to Detroit in record time, just in time for my lady friend to tell me she has to do homework and study and I should not distract her. HA! When I get there, everyone in the house is ready to party. Captain Morgan makes an appearance, the beer pong table is brought out, so the party has started.

Fast forward through shots, more shots, mixed drinks and birthday cake. The party is shutting down, sometime about 3 in the morning. A guest who was definitely staying the night is on the floor, passed out. You know I had to pick him up and put him on the couch. He's incoherent and as soon as I move from dumping him on the sofa, he begins to projectile vomit on himself. I immediately sober up and help take care of the poor guy. We clean the mess the best we could, or until I got fed up with it, and just left him to lie in his own mess. As I walk upstairs to go to sleep, this guy on the couch with the t-shirt stained in vomit whispers, "I have got to stop drinking so much."

You think?

Ah, yes. I am in college again. Lovely.